When hope is gone..

i dunno whether is it jus me or its jus part of life...but i always wonder why do i have to so often feel my hopes have to always end up crushed?? i mean am i askin too much jus to be happy?? i mean wtf? like rejection is not good enuf now i can even hope for somethin??

i admit i haven been all dat good but wat abt d lil good ive done? dont i deserve a lil compassion?? wat have i done to deserve such ill treatment? s much as i know i have expensive taste but i dun usually get wat i wat..cos u know y..cos im not all dat lucky to recieve a box of somethin i want or like to open..d oni way is freakin work for it..y does it have to b so hard? WHY??
now i cant even concentrate on somethin without thinkin abt..knowing dat i will neva have d fucking chance to even b happy..ppl can say theres others who are suffering more than i am..but i dun fucking give a fuck..i have my share of hardships i dun need to bear more hardships of others...

i wud trade anything jus to b happy right now..sighhh...

if there was something i wish i had..that something would be happiness..happiness that will surpass this sorrow and emptiness..if only this day would end..i wouldnt have to shed more tears than i already have..for these tears can only mean sadness at this point of time..if i could change how i feel now i would..but there is jus no strength left..none to even wipe these tears of mine..if tomorrow would come earlier..this misery may end sooner..soon enough to take these crushed hopes adrift..but that tomorrow may take neither hours,nor days for YOU will always be there in the corner of my mind and it will remain s long s u r around..like it has always been the past years..

as i mentioned before...
to be JOINT FOREVER in LOVE is life changing..
but since it neva happened and i doubt it will happen in d future, therefore i will not have or may neva have dat life changing experience..

but seriously..like who am i kidding?? seriously!!! comparing wit someone like her...now i think i shud jus slap my head..maybe its jus another test huh..its always a test..

so that people is how i end my somewhat happening October month...


~floriferous out~
*Missing you by First Lady plays in d background*
how nice jus d song i need..